How to Get Restful Sleep for the Whole Family with Board-Certified Pediatrician and Sleep Doctor Dr. Funke Brown
One of the biggest stressors for parents is helping a child get to sleep and stay asleep, and when kids are not sleeping, the adults usually are not either.
Board-certified pediatrician and sleep medicine physician Dr. Funke Brown joins Marijo to talk about looking for the root causes of poor sleep, including sleep apnea, nutrition and habits, and the everyday changes that help the whole family rest. She also shares why parents need to look after their own sleep too.
What you'll learn in this episode
Sleep is not a passive process. Dr. Brown says sleep is an active process, with memories, the immune system and hormones all changing while we sleep. She encourages families to see sleep as a hidden gem and a tool that helps us be our best selves.
Look at sleep from several angles. Dr. Brown describes three buckets: medical causes such as a sleep disorder or vitamin deficiencies, behavioral pieces such as sleep habits and phone use, and 24-hour factors such as anxiety or ADHD.
Sleep apnea can affect young children. Dr. Brown says snoring, mouth breathing and restless sleep can be signs, and that sleep apnea is not as uncommon as people think, affecting about 1 to 5% of children.
Restless sleep may point to a nutrient issue. She says a child who moves around a lot in their sleep may have a nutrient deficiency, such as low iron, and that this kind of restlessness is sometimes not normal.
Poor sleep affects the whole household. Dr. Brown says children may be irritable, sleepy, impulsive or moody, while parents can face a poorer quality of life, strain in their relationships and even time off work.
Start with consistency and a routine. Her number one tip is a consistent bedtime and wake-up time, without sleeping in excessively, followed by a wind-down routine such as a bath or a book.
Keep the bedroom cool, dark and noise-free, and limit screens. Dr. Brown recommends limiting phones, iPads and TV about 60 minutes before bed, because of the light and the content. She also suggests avoiding caffeine such as soda and iced tea.
Ask whether it is fear or something medical. Dr. Brown suggests noticing whether a child snores, gasps, grinds their teeth or sleeps restlessly, which may signal a medical issue. If anxiety shows up during the day too, she would focus on the anxiety itself.
Start with your pediatrician. Dr. Brown says to speak up and ask for testing, since you are your child's best advocate. Your pediatrician can refer you to a sleep doctor or an ear, nose and throat doctor, and for children CPAP is rarely the first choice.
Parents are the role models. Dr. Brown reminds parents to look after their own sleep, because your child is watching you.
About the guest: Dr. Funke Afolabi-Brown
Dr. Funke Afolabi-Brown is a board-certified pediatrician with extensive experience working with children who suffer from a range of sleep issues, including insomnia, sleep apnea, and behavioral sleep disorders. Her holistic and compassionate approach to care sets her apart as a trusted expert in her field.
Dr. Afolabi-Brown earned her medical degree from the University of Ibadan, Nigeria, completed her pediatrics residency at the Children's Hospital of Philadelphia (CHOP), and pursued a fellowship in sleep medicine at the University of Pennsylvania, where she gained specialized expertise in diagnosing and treating sleep disorders in children.
Beyond her clinical work, Dr. Afolabi-Brown is an advocate for sleep health education. She raises awareness about the importance of sleep through community outreach, public speaking and digital media, with a mission to empower parents and caregivers with the knowledge and tools they need to create healthy sleep habits for their children. She is also active in several medical associations, including the American Academy of Sleep Medicine (AASM), the American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP), and the Society of Behavioral Sleep Medicine.
Her book: Beyond Tired
Website: therestfulsleepplace.com
Instagram: @restfulsleepmd
Facebook: facebook.com/restfulsleepmd
LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/drfunkebrown
YouTube: Dr. Funke Brown on YouTube
T
his episode is for general information only and is not medical advice. If you have concerns about your child's sleep or your own, talk with your own doctor or health provider before making changes to your health, diet or routine.
Enjoyed this episode? Subscribe to the podcast by emailing subscribe@teachingyourtoddler.com, and leave a 5-star review or a thumbs up so we can reach more parents like you.
Full episode transcript
Read the full transcript
Intro (recorded)
One of the biggest stressors for parents is helping their child get to sleep and stay asleep. Bedtime can be a real battle for parents at times. And today's guest is here to help alleviate that by looking for root causes and also how you parents can help relieve your sleep issues as well. Because when the whole family sleeps well, things go better. Hi, I'm Marijo Tinlin from the Teaching Your Toddler Show. Today's guest is Dr. Funke Afolabi-Brown and she is a board-certified pediatrician with extensive experience working with children who suffer from a range of sleep issues including insomnia, sleep apnea, and behavioral sleep disorders. Her holistic and compassionate approach set her apart as a trusted expert in her field.
Dr. Brown earned her medical degree from the University of Ibadan, Nigeria, one of Africa's premier institutions for medical education.
Marijo: Hello, this is Marijo Tinlin from the Teaching Your Toddler Show. Today we have a great guest who is going to help us with a problem that everyone suffers from, not even just kids, parents of kids, but all of us. And that is sleep. So, Dr. Funke Brown, welcome to the show. Please tell us a little bit about yourself.
Dr. Brown: Yeah, thank you so much for having me. I am a sleep medicine physician and also I had previous toddlers so I've been in that stage and one of the things that's been my mission is to help families optimize their sleep so that they can thrive and reach their fullest potential. When kids are not sleeping then we as adults are not sleeping as well. So I really kind of work from a based approach.
Marijo: Oh that's excellent. So for everyone I did see in the notes that you sent I saw something about changing our relationship with sleep. So can you explain that a little bit?
Dr. Brown: Yes. So there's been this old narrative I think it's starting to improve where people felt that sleep was just this extra thing you had it you had to do. And so a lot of us don't prioritize sleep and it's for multiple reasons. Sometimes it's really because we're just constantly connected. Sometimes it's because we're not even aware of how important sleep is. And so really understanding how important sleep is and seeing it as this hidden gem and tool that we have that can help us to really be our best selves has been my mission in trying to help people really change how they see sleep
Marijo: And how they see benefits. Yeah. Yeah. It is something I mean like physiologically our bodies change when we're sleeping, right? There's things that happen.
Dr. Brown: Absolutely. Absolutely. It's not a passive process. Sleep is a pretty active process. There's a lot going on. Your memories gets reset. Your immune system, your hormones, so many changes are going on.
Marijo: Wow, that's amazing. And so one of the things that you have and you have a book that we would love to hear about, but you talk about a holistic approach. So tell us a little bit about that. I guess that means you don't use sleep aids or you're not taking medicine.
Dr. Brown: Yeah. Yeah. So I'm not a fan of that. I mean, they have it their role. So I do have certain conditions where we do use sleep medications but really looking at things from multiple lens I think is the is my mission and it's been my approach with my patients my clients and all of that. So, we're looking at sleep from just even the medical standpoint, right? Is there a sleep disorder going on? You know, those are things that we know, okay, you need maybe you need medication, maybe you need surgery, maybe you need CPAP, maybe you need that kind of thing, you need some blood work to check on you know, how well you are supported from a nutritional standpoint cuz there's a lot of abnormal vitamin deficiencies that can make it hard for you to sleep.
So we're looking at all of that and then you know there's kind of what we call the behavioral pieces and this is where I think a lot of people have an understanding of. So it's the sleep habits, the hygiene and you know the cell phone use and all of that. So that's one bucket. And then the third bucket I call or the third category are those 24-hour factors that can affect our sleep. So if you have someone who has anxiety, who has ADHD, who's, you know, has all those struggles, they have their own sleep manifestations and really it all kind of has this interplay. So we're looking at it very very holistically.
I guess it's the way we can we can we can address it. And then we're also addressing issues the sleep issues based on what we find out from those evaluations.
Marijo: And how how are you doing those evaluations? Is that an office? Is that something that people can do virtually with you?
Dr. Brown: Both actually. So we offer I'm licensed in a few states, California, New Jersey, Pennsylvania, a few other states are coming up. And so people see me either in person. So people travel or they, you know, those that are local see me locally. But for those who you know they're at a distance we can we offer virtual appointments as well. So we have this meeting with the entire family and we go through a comprehensive sleep evaluation and then they get a road map as to what exactly intervention looks like you know immediate intervention at about 3 months 6 months and beyond because it's not usually just one thing over time sleep issues evolve.
So, I really want to equip families with the tools they need if things do change as the child gets older.
Marijo: Awesome. And what are I mean, you mentioned you've had children. We we presumably people listening have children. So, what are the common sleep issues that we have? I mean, clearly, you know, we always have this benchmark of like is your baby sleeping through the night? So, like what are some of those sort of common sleep issues that children have?
Marijo: And then so for parents of children, what are some of the common sleep issues that you're seeing in children specifically? I know you talked about anxiety and ADHD which apparently which clearly can happen. I'm I'm guessing there's also physiological things but what are some of those common issues you see with children?
Dr. Brown: Yeah, I see you know varying ages. So depending on you know since this is a toddler show I see sleep apnea. It's not as uncommon as people think. So our kids that have snoring and they have mouth breathing and restless sleep often times when we do a sleep study we might see sleep apnea. So that's one thing. Another that we see frequently can be insomnia. So, a lot of the behavioral sleep issues. So, you know, the child that doesn't want to stay in their bed, that has multiple requests at bedtime and, you know, is really pushing those boundaries. So, all those things can also affect sleep.
And then we see things like very restless sleep. A lot of children are moving around a lot in their sleep. And sometimes this is actually not normal. It's related to some abnormal, you know, nutrient deficiencies like iron and things like that. So, those are some of the most common sleep issues we see in the younger in the younger age group.
Marijo: I had no idea that little kids could get sleep apnea. That that always seems like it's an older thing.
Dr. Brown: Yeah. No, I definitely I would say, you know, the prevalence is about one to about 5% in children of sleep apnea. It's not uncommon.
Marijo: Oh, well, and so what on when we're not sleeping well and if if clearly if you're waking up in the night, if the children are coming in to wake you up now, the whole family has gotten awake. What what does that what what happens to the family dynamic when people aren't sleeping well?
Dr. Brown: A lot. You know, I think, you know, most people are focusing on Yeah. The child, but also the parents struggle when their child's not sleeping well. So you may see kids with a lot of irritability. They may be sleepy. They may be impulsive. There may be, you know, mood issues. But in the parents as well, you know, poor quality of life. Most times if you have a child that's not sleeping, they are, you know, there's probably a parent that's there that's also not sleeping very well. So really impacts, I would say, the entire household. I've had families where there's now a lot of strain in the parents relationships because of the child's poor sleep.
I've had parents who had had to take time off work because it was just really hard for them to navigate everything the sleep issues that their child is going through.
Marijo: That's really hard. I mean, it's really hard for a whole family when that happens. So, you mentioned some of the things I would guess that you would talk about, but what are some of the ways that people can optimize? You mentioned like sleep hygiene which I'm guessing is like how dark is your room and do you have electronics and what are some of those kinds of things?
Dr. Brown: Yeah. Yeah. So I would say the number one thing actually I usually talk about is consistency. Consistent bedtime is so important. Because it really sets everything else up for the day. So try to avoid sleeping in excessively. Try to be as consistent in terms of the bedtime and the wake up time. Then the next thing would be a bedtime routine, right? Those activities that kind of helps the child wind down and relax for sleep. And so it might be having a bath, reading a book, you know, those kind of things. And then we talk about the environment. So that's the one you were talking about.
So you want to make sure the bedroom is dark, it is noiseree, it is cool, those three things. So cool, dark, and noise free. And then typically another thing I talk about is really avoiding technology before bed. So a lot of you know times they may be on their iPad or their phone. So you want to limit that use about 60 minutes before bed ideally. Because the disruption from the light and all of that and also the content that they're watching either on TV or on their phones can definitely impact their sleep.
Marijo: Mhm. So that counts for TV too, not just home, not just phones or iPads. Yeah. Okay.
Dr. Brown: Exactly. Exactly. And then the last thing would be, you know, really making sure you avoid any caffeine, you know, soda, iced tea, all those things can make it very hard to wind down for sleep.
Marijo: Oh, that affects me a lot. I can't I mean, I have to stop at like 1 or two in the afternoon and then I can't I can't do anything else or I know I'm going to stay awake all night. Oh my gosh. Oh wow. These are these are great tips. What what else do parents need to know? What else like I mean if if I'm trying to ask like so if if they're like you mentioned if a child comes in for bed I mean how do you know that the that they're not scared versus having a sleep issue?
Dr. Brown: Yeah that's a very important question. So most of the things we talk about is around like healthy sleep habits, sleep hygiene, but beyond that there's a whole world of sleep disorders that some kids may be struggling with and sometimes when your child's sleep is off. It's just a symptom of something else. It could be a symptom again of like you said anxiety of fear and so there different strategies. I think the important thing is making sure that they are safe. So how are they sleeping? Are they having a very restless sleep? Are they snoring? Are they gasping? Those kind of things. What's their day like?
Right? So that can help you clue in as to whether there's a medical issue. Do they have teeth grinding? Do they have very restless sleep? And if they do, then I would suspect that those are medical issues that are impacting them. And then if you have a child who is, you know, otherwise maybe they have a lot of anxiety. And you're noticing that the anxiety is not just at bedtime. For instance, you're noticing this child gets very stressed out. Even during the day, they have separation anxiety, then in that case, I would focus on really dealing with the overall generalized anxiety cuz it's not just about sleep.
Marijo: Yeah. And if if people live outside of where they would be able to work with you, is this a question for a pediatrician? Is it an ENT? Is it like who do you go see?
Dr. Brown: Yeah. So, I think your pediatrician is always the first step. And I always encourage parents, you know, whether you whether you think your child has a sleep disorder or not, you do not keep quiet because you're your child's best advocate. So, speak with your pediatrician, ask for testing. You know, most states have other their sleep other sleep doctors that they could refer you to. If there's concern about apnea, you can definitely see the ear, nose, and throat doctor as well.
Marijo: Is sleep apnea I mean do you have to wear a CPAP or is there other things you can do for that?
Dr. Brown: Yeah for kids you hardly ever resort to CPAP sleep to the CPAP most times we do surgical treatments if they have big tonsils which are the tissues at the back of their throat or big adenoids. For those who have you know abnormal sort of narrow airway maybe because their they have a high arched pallet or you know their hard pallet is kind of high and so there's no room for their tongue to sit we may do orthodontics So that's an option as well and then for those who maybe they have allergies reflux all these other medical issues optimizing that can actually improve their sleep apnea
Marijo: Awesome excellent very good well tell us a little bit about about the book Beyond Tired.
Dr. Brown: Yeah. So, this book I wrote last year now. It's been it was just such a beautiful experience to put that out in the world. So, like you said, There are not very many pediatric specific sleep doctors in the world. So, a lot of people are at a loss. Depending on where you're living, some people don't have access to people with my kind of expertise. So this book really breaks everything down in terms of what does your child's sleep, what's your child's sleep supposed to look like? What does abnormal look like? How do you actually get good sleep? What do you need to look out for to make sure that you are optimizing sleep for your child?
And then I have chapters on, you know, sleep in ADHD. I have chapters on sleep for parents. I have chapters on sleep for when you're co-parenting. So, I think it's really comprehensive guide for sleep issues that parents can use.
Marijo: That's excellent. And where can people find your book?
Dr. Brown: So, if you go to my website, you could find the link there. It's therestfulsleepplace.com. It's also available on Amazon, actually. So, if you put beyond tired book on Amazon, it should it should come up.
Marijo: Oh, excellent. Well, we of course will make sure that there that those links are in the show notes so people can find you find the book as well. And before I let you go, what what other things do we need to know? Anything that I miss that you would like to tell the audience?
Dr. Brown: Yeah, I think what I would say is a lot of focus is on our kids and many times we as parents forget to take care of ourselves. So even though you are trying to get your child to sleep better, you have to realize that you're the role model. So, your child is watching you. So, you have to also make sure that you're optimizing your sleep, not just for you, but for the child that's watching you.
Marijo: Ah, good advice. We try to do that for our 17-year-old and he doesn't pay attention. Thank you so much. Tell us where to find you before I let you go.
Dr. Brown: Yeah, thank you so much for having me. So, my website is a good place to go. It's therestfulsleepplace.com or restfulsleepmd.com. They're both good lead you to the same place. And then I'm on social media at restfulsleepmd and also on YouTube at restfulsleepmd. So I have a YouTube channel with a lot of valuable information and then I also have the following on social media too.
Marijo: Excellent. Great. Well, it's been such a pleasure Dr. Brown. Thank you so much for all of your help today. I think the re the listeners were going to get a lot of a lot of great information.
Dr. Brown: Thank you so much for having me.
Outro (recorded)
This has been the Teaching Your Toddler podcast with Marijo Tinlin. Thank you so much for joining us today. I hope you'll find us on our website at teachingyourtoddler.com as well as on Facebook at teachingyourtoddler on Instagram and on Twitter at teaching toddler. So join us again and I hope you have a wonderful week. Thank you so much.
Comments